What do you think of when you hear the words “self-care?” I envision a day at the spa, a shopping spree and then a relaxing evening at home in my favorite loungewear with a steaming cup of coffee and either a good book or a TV show I’ve been wanting to watch.

The reality is, that sort of self-care day is not likely to happen for me – ever. But that doesn’t mean I can’t take some little element of that dream day and make it a regular part of my reality.

As a functional medicine health coach, this is a topic that comes up quite a lot. So I thought it would be great to address it here. Please comment below and add to the conversation!

When someone asks how you are, what do you most often answer?

Busy

Tired

Stressed

Fine

Does that sound familiar?

Why are we always so busy, tired, stressed and just fine? Believe it or not, if we make a concerted effort to care for ourselves – in the way we need most and without guilt – we are more likely to feel: relaxed, rested, in control and great!

The question is: how do we do that? How do we take time to take care of ourselves when we’re so busy taking care of everyone else?

As a health coach, I don’t answer that for you. Sorry. I ask you another question: What do you think?

What are the circumstances around you feeling your best?

Is it when you’re with a lot of people? Is it when you’re alone? Is it after an exercise class? Is it after a nap?

What causes you to feel rested and restored?

Time away? Time at home?

How often do you think you need these restoring moments or activities?

Daily? Weekly? Monthly?

Please take some time and really think about your answers.

If you have young children at home this will look different than it does if you’re working a 9-5 with teenagers at home or if you’re nearing retirement age. Just because your current life circumstances are challenging, doesn’t mean you throw self-care out the window. It just means that your self-care routine will look different as you age and your life circumstances change.

Why not make a plan right now? Yes, I mean right this minute. Think about what you’d like to try for self-care. Then look at your calendar (you know I’m big on planning and calendars!), and figure out how you can fit it in. Then make a commitment to yourself to carry out your plans and give yourself permission to do it. Give yourself grace if you think you should be at home cleaning rather than getting your nails done (just an example). You will mostly likely do that cleaning with joy and energy if you’ve taken the time to take care of yourself first.

Want some ideas for easy self-care? Really, you have to figure out what you want/need and what works for your life, but here are a couple ideas:

• Take a walk break: this is a great one whether you are a stay-at-home mom, corporate executive or anything in between. Everyone can find a time in their day to step outside and walk – it doesn’t have to be long – 5 minutes is enough.
• Once a week treat yourself to a favorite beverage. Do you love the peppermint mocha at your favorite coffee place, but know it’s full of sugar and over-priced, but it makes you so happy? Figure out how often you can afford it and go for it! (Remember that you can ask that they use less of the sweet syrup if that’s a concern.)
• Play your favorite song and dance like nobody’s watching. I particularly like to do this one when my kids are around because they’re super cool teenagers and it embarrasses them like crazy, which just adds to my joy!
• Plan a treat meal. Notice I didn’t say “cheat” meal. You’re not cheating anything by eating gluten free pizza. You’re treating yourself. This one really works best when it’s planned so you can look forward to it. My easy example: I eat ice cream when we’re on vacation, but very, very rarely at home. So when we have a trip coming up, I really look forward to that little treat.
• Rest! Whether this means sleeping in a little later than normal one day or actually taking a nap in the afternoon, rest is restorative to your body and your soul. Sitting down to rest doesn’t have to mean falling asleep. It can mean giving yourself permission to read a chapter of a book or watch a quick YouTube video. Whatever rest looks like for you.

These are just a few, very simple examples.

My challenge to you is this:

1. Figure out what self-care means to you
2. Decide how often you need that particular kind of care
3. Schedule it/Plan it
4. Hold yourself accountable to your plan – maybe this means setting a reminder on your phone or an alarm on your watch or telling someone who will remind you

Let me know how this goes for you!